reverse threading

the path back is the path forward


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“go away!” yikes. [two artists tuesday]

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“GO AWAY” it reads.  the sign on this front door is bracing.  not just a polite “no soliciting” or even a rougher “no trespassing”, “GO AWAY” is kind of frightening.  i don’t really like aggressive people…the kind of people who choose attack-mode first, before anything else.  the kind of people who act like they are “communicating”, but are, indeed, just stoking the fire with toxic non-communicative venom.  yikes.  GO AWAY.

reading the news app on our phones each morning makes us think the words “GO AWAY” every day.  certain folks, bullying and disrespectful, on all sides of the aisle, rungs of the ladder and regardless of their political leanings, need to tame their thinking and rhetoric.  it’s bracing.  yikes.  GO AWAY.

the person revving their engine in the car behind you.  they weave back and forth from one side of the lane to the other, flashing lights, putting their car into neutral, revving once again…all while you search for a place to safely pull over so that they might pass, despite the passing-zone you are driving in.  their angry behavior is bracing.  yikes.  GO AWAY.

the problem with all of this is that making someone GO AWAY doesn’t really make them go away.  it just nullifies the problem for a moment or two.  it doesn’t render them less aggressive; it doesn’t enlighten them.  it just makes you THINK they are gone.  unless you hold the whole world in a restraining-order-pose, you will have to deal with aggressive people and their aggression.  there must be a common place we can all share.

maybe we don’t really need signs that say “GO AWAY”.  maybe we need signs that say “COME IN.  LET’S TALK.”

read DAVID’S thoughts this TWO ARTISTS TUESDAY

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when push comes to shove, don’t. [merely-a-thought monday]

civility 2 copy

my sweet momma always said that you can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.  although she stood her ground, she rarely pushed back.  well, maybe at my dad…i certainly heard her push back in that relationship.  she was a woman before her time, struggling to be seen and heard…in relationship, in work, in the world.  nevertheless, she lead with kindness and generosity.

recently i surprisingly found myself in a situation where i felt the kind of civility that is needed to accomplish anything was lacking.  instead it was aggressive, pointed, antagonistic.  “when push comes to shove” implies escalation and this, indeed, was the case.  instead of actual conversation, it was a push-shove back-and-forth.  instead of communication, it was a shining example of what-not-to-do.

we drove past a passiton billboard on the way up north that read these words:  when push comes to shove, don’t.  civility is in you.  what does a boorish push or a retorted shove accomplish other than an establishment of immaturity, a driving desire and play for power and an uncooperative non-collaboration?

civility is not that hard.  it should be what we lead with.  respecting others and their place in their world.  we each get the same air to breathe and we each breathe in and out the same way.  instead of escalating to shove or pushing yet harder, how might we fill our lungs with responses of peacefulness, thoughtfulness, fairness, appreciation, intelligent consideration, magnanimity, grace, even reconciliation.  why must push come to shove?  it needn’t.

just don’t.

read DAVID’S thoughts this MERELY-A-THOUGHT MONDAY

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