reverse threading

the path back is the path forward


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when push comes to shove, don’t. [merely-a-thought monday]

civility 2 copy

my sweet momma always said that you can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.  although she stood her ground, she rarely pushed back.  well, maybe at my dad…i certainly heard her push back in that relationship.  she was a woman before her time, struggling to be seen and heard…in relationship, in work, in the world.  nevertheless, she lead with kindness and generosity.

recently i surprisingly found myself in a situation where i felt the kind of civility that is needed to accomplish anything was lacking.  instead it was aggressive, pointed, antagonistic.  “when push comes to shove” implies escalation and this, indeed, was the case.  instead of actual conversation, it was a push-shove back-and-forth.  instead of communication, it was a shining example of what-not-to-do.

we drove past a passiton billboard on the way up north that read these words:  when push comes to shove, don’t.  civility is in you.  what does a boorish push or a retorted shove accomplish other than an establishment of immaturity, a driving desire and play for power and an uncooperative non-collaboration?

civility is not that hard.  it should be what we lead with.  respecting others and their place in their world.  we each get the same air to breathe and we each breathe in and out the same way.  instead of escalating to shove or pushing yet harder, how might we fill our lungs with responses of peacefulness, thoughtfulness, fairness, appreciation, intelligent consideration, magnanimity, grace, even reconciliation.  why must push come to shove?  it needn’t.

just don’t.

read DAVID’S thoughts this MERELY-A-THOUGHT MONDAY

momma, d & k website box


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civility is in you. [not-so-flawed wednesday]

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it was election day and i was passing through the denver airport, walking from one end of the united airlines terminal to the other.  i knew that later that night, i would be tuning in to the results of the midterm elections and would, undoubtedly, read a plethora of articles on my news app that would sadden me.  the divisiveness is palpable, an uneven heartbeat in our country, a dis-ease that is rampant.

i passed a bank of telephones (the ones that you put coins in to make phone calls) and above each cubicle was a poster.  i read each as i walked past.  i was much further down the terminal when i turned around to go back.  lincoln’s words captured my attention and i wanted to pass-it-on as the poster says.  “a house divided…cannot stand.”

it made me wish for what should be simple things:  dialogue.  grace.  equality.  kindness. unity.  and yes, civility.  they are all there.  in us.

pass it on.

read DAVID’S words this NOT-SO-FLAWED WEDNESDAY

bong trail, wisconsin website box

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