reverse threading

the path back is the path forward


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treading water. watershed. [k.s. friday]

watershed the songbox

i don’t feel as much in-a-boat as i feel that i am relentlessly treading water.  but there was no handy treading-water bitmoji and i remember the exact moment that this bitmoji showed up on my snapchat mapping…in the middle of a lot of treading.

treading, treading.  guessing at why what-is-happening is happening – in wide concentric circles around us, tightly close to us.

i can only guess, as i type this with these two now-familiar broken wrists, that this is a watershed time.

watershed pronunciation

definition 2

and today, both valentine’s day and d’s birthday, i want to express gratitude for this man who is standing in the water with me – waves crashing over us, undertow threatening to pull us down, riptide ever present – and holding my fiberglass-cast-encased hand.  the person who is equally as perplexed at this time, who takes turns with me being alternatively flabbergasted, philosophical and soberingly pragmatic.

he continues to zip my jacket, buckle my seatbelt, paste my toothbrush, carry my music, pepper-mill my breakfast and dinner, put the ernie straw in my coffee.  he has learned the fine points of where-on-the-head to place hair conditioner, how best to tie plastic bags on my arms, what stool will work best at the piano, which wine glass i can pick up at the end of a day.  he has watched me learn how to hold mascara with two hands and pull up girl jeans by the belt loops.  he has been treading water with me as we look to the horizon.

maybe this watershed is the thing that elicits change.  at the end of 2019 i could feel it coming.  and i can now, with all authority and certainty, say that the change is not that i will, smack dab in the middle of middle-age, become a professional snowboarder.  nope.  but there may truly be things out there i just didn’t see or consider.  perhaps the things that are vexing us, stunning us, deeply disappointing us, are just the things that will propel us.  ah, if that just didn’t feel so pollyanna-ish.

this life is bigger than anyone can ever live it.  that includes us.  treading water in the watershed might be a time that forces dynamic change.  like everyone, i wish i had some prescient inkling of what’s-out-there, what-will-happen.

my perceived lack of control is maybe a misperception.  maybe that which has taken away control is conversely granting control, granting the creativity that comes with grabbing onto flotsam and jetsam in a sea that seems to be swirling.  maybe the grasping-at-straws is grasping-at-ernie, a touchstone that seems flimsy and unimportant, but which actually is grounding, rooting, and gives voice to more solid footing, less wave-action, more direction-choosing.

the watershed is here.  moment by moment we stare at it.  we roll our eyes, we yell at the angst-y details, we shake our heads in confusion, we stop and stand still and, yet hyperventilating from treading, we wonder.  we try to breathe, to center, to be in the eye of the storm.

holding hand-cast, we look forward and we guess that this ain’t the last watershed on the horizon.

 

download WATERSHED from AS IT IS on iTUNES or CDBaby

read DAVID’S thoughts this K.S. FRIDAY

freezing des plaines website box

WATERSHED from AS IT IS ©️ 2004 kerri sherwood

 

 


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we don’t really pay attention. [d.r. thursday]

Icarus-withEdge copy.jpg

and then, while no one really paid attention – distracted by other things….

this painting is called ICARUS and, not being too much of a study in mythology, david told me the story.  now, somewhere in the bank of knowledge that i have learned and somehow forgotten, it resonated.  no matter.  it is certainly relevant now.  the shout of “squirrel!!” and the shifting of gaze happens time and again.  our attention-deficited-culture becomes distracted by you-name-it and we miss things that are happening, that are more monumental than we realize.  icarus flew too close to the sun.  we try too hard.  we push.  we seek to achieve.  we don’t pay attention.  we miss.  we get burned and fall.  others fall around us.  we don’t really pay attention.

what is really happening in our world while we are paying attention to the latest headline?  what is really happening in our world while we get caught up in the latest rhetoric?  what is really happening in our world as our politicians play shell games with us while the stuff of real importance they skirt past us?

david knows that i don’t really like this painting.  it’s one of a very few that i would say that about.  (just as i am quite sure there are musical compositions of mine that are not his favorite.)  i feel a kind of mayhem, a kind of negativity from it.  it unnerves me.  but, alas, it is a contemporary statement.  we don’t really pay attention.

read DAVID’S thoughts this D.R. THURSDAY

view ICARUS in the gallery

k&dbw backs website box_.jpg

ICARUS ©️ 2005 david robinson